Where are you now?

A film about life, loss and transience with Gennaro Contaldo.

After losing two of my closest friends in two consecutive years, a lot of darkness and despair followed. During that time I read a book called Grief Works by Julia Samuel. It is an incredibly uncomfortable read. It honestly felt a bit like torture at times. It is a series of case studies of people in therapy with Julia and she lays out their stories in full. The closest comparison I can make is immersion therapy. You get so deep into other peoples pain that it somehow makes you feel less alone.
It is a reminder that loss is an unfortunate but unarguable fact of life. There is no quick fix to grief or to the pain that consumes you. I don’t think this book will cure you like maybe I thought it would, and to be fair it never claims to. But it raises some important points. One of them comes up in the introduction where she talks about how, in Britain and in the West, our approach to death is tricky. Talking about it is still taboo. We avoid it at all costs. That became the core of why I wanted to make this film. To talk about something that is difficult. To try and normalise it, even if only slightly.

So many other cultures approach death more openly, with community and with practices that help people through it and hold their hand while they grieve.

I have worked with Gennaro Contaldo for many years now. There are very few people I have met who have his energy for life. It has always fascinated me. I have been around him during tough moments of his life too. I was working with him regularly when his best friend died, and when his sister passed. But I rarely felt like he lost his lust for life. One of the bigger jobs we did together was filmed in Italy. We recreated a recipe and a scene he had previously filmed for Two Greedy Italians. In it he reminisces about the good times with that friend and gets caught up by emotion as he talks. It was tough to film but it was important. He wanted to do it because he felt it mattered to talk about these things and not hide from them. To show the joy and the sadness. It clearly left a mark on me. Fast forward to now and I found myself in a similar position, thinking about my own friends who were no longer here.

In the dark days and nights, I kept thinking about Gennaro as someone wise, sensitive and experienced. Someone I could talk to about all of this openly. I wanted to know how he navigated his own losses. How he carried on with such energy and optimism. So instead of just talking privately, I thought maybe we could talk through film. Maybe it could open up the conversation to a wider audience. Even if it is only a tiny contribution to a subject we hate to discuss.
You might be at a point in life where this is not something you have experienced much, so a film about grief might feel too depressing. That is okay. Scroll on by. But one day this might help you. If nothing else it might make you feel less alone. Loss is hard and it is lonely. Everyone deals with it differently, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. But talking about it helps. Even if it only makes things feel a little less lonely.

Production Company – Chop House Films
TALENT: Gennaro Contaldo
DIRECTOR: George Foote
DOP: Tristam Cones
LOCATION SOUND: Alex Mckenzie
KIT: Panalight
NEGATIVE PROSCESSING: CINECITTA S.P.A
NEGATIVE SCAN: Digital Orchard Group
EDITOR: Julian Fletcher
COMPOSER: Marcus Allard
SESSION MUSICIAN: Jamie Romain
COLOURIST: Jonny Tully
POST PRODUCTION STUDIO: No.8
AUDIO DESIGN & MIX: Joss Mogli
AUDIO STUDIO: No.8
POST JUNIOR PRODUCER: Calum Martineau
TITLES: Jason Mallett

Shot on Kodak
Shot on location in Minori, Italy